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My Mum / Dad is Having an Affair

Life as a teenager is challenging as there are pressures from peers, school and the changing physical, sexual and emotional aspects of your body. The only constant and stable aspect in your lives are your famillies. Congratulations if you belong to a loving stable family.

However you may experience turmoil and conflict in your family if one of your parents or both are having an extramarital affair. This can be very hard for you and your siblings as the stability of family is now threatened and you are also coping with the demands of being a teenager.

Remember that it is not your fault that your mum or dad is having an affair. They are adults and their actions are purely between them and only they can justify it.

It is important that you remain neutral and not take sides even if they force you against each other. It is important also for your parents to remain as good parents together for you and your siblings even if the marriage is crumbling.

You can have a frank discussion with your parents to say how you feel and encourage them not to fight in front of you and the siblings. Your parents should resolve the issues privately and amicably.
This can result in a divorce or your parents end up marrying again in the future.

Sources: http://dvsl3w2q45hb8.cloudfront.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/cartoons.jpg

Sources: http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_SM0zDFH7a5U/TN3fw5vh_KI/AAAAAAAAA74/ /cheating.jpg

What can i do if my parents are having an affair?

1. Try to keep the peace. It is difficult when your parents are fighting and bickering. There are a lot of harsh words exchange and you can try to talk to your parents to be sensitive to you and your siblings by resolving the conflict privately whilst keeping peace in the home. Be firm and tell them you don’t want to be caught in the middle.

2. Be fair. It’s important that parents don’t try to get them to “take sides.” You need to feel free to hang out with and talk to each of your parents without the other parent acting jealous, hurt, or mad.

3. Talk. Tell your parents how you feel and have open communication about the future should they proceed with a divorce. Get the help of other extended family members if possible. Encourage your parents to seek help from counsellors. If you find it hard to confront your parents, try writing them a letter.

Sources: www.rightthisminute.com

4. Getting support. Talk about your feelings with someone you trust. If you are feeling depressed or stressed out, or if it’s hard to concentrate on your normal activities, let a counselor or therapist help you. You may want to see your doctor if you are feeling depressed about your parents situation.

Be positive.

Hopefully your parents will resolve their private matters soon. Giving it time, letting others support you along the way, and keeping an eye on the good things in your life will help you in dealing with the situation.


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Last Reviewed : 4 Disember 2014
Writer : Datin Dr. Sheila Marimuthu
Accreditor : Dr. Nik Rubiah bte Nik Abdul Rashid